What is divorce?

Of course, we all know what a divorce is on a basic level. With so many marriages in the present era going wrong and ending messily, there are more divorces now than there have ever been. Although the statistics are depressing when you hear them the truth of the matter is that some time ago, when divorce was rarer, more stigmatized and more difficult to carry out, a lot of people spent much of their lives trapped in marriages that were not only poorly-matched, but often involved violence, mental bullying and an extensive list of other drawbacks. While it may be desirable that the divorce rates slow down, it is equally the case that things would be helped in no small amount by the introduction of some realism in cases where couples get married early in a relationship. 

A divorce itself is the formalized and permanent separation of a marriage under the law. Often people will refer to a couple as being divorced before any such process has taken place, and what they are technically referring to is a separation. For a couple to be divorced, a process needs to be instigated and completed to the satisfaction of all parties involved – the couple, and the state in which they are permanently resident. This process can be fairly rapid, but in reality the duration will depend very much upon the cordiality of relations between the spouses. If the separation is what we generally refer to as “amicable” and the divorce is a simple matter of two people making a clean break, the process will generally be quick. If however the break-up is messy, fraught with legal issues and between two people who may even refuse to speak to one another, divorce proceedings may well drag somewhat. 

There are numerous circumstances in which a divorce may come to pass. If a couple feel that they have reached the end of their time together, that either or both of them is unsatisfied in the marriage, then it is common for them to separate unofficially. After they have lived separately for 12 months they can divorce almost immediately with no need for any fault to be proven on either spouse’s behalf. Conversely, if the point of separation in a marriage occurs because one spouse has been unfaithful, a legal case is likely to result, and damages to be paid out. 

In divorce proceedings there are two stages – the decree nisi and the decree absolute. The first stage is when a ruling is made by the court for the divorce, stating that it will not come into full effect until a certain condition is met. This condition can be any one of a number of things, although as often as not it is simply the consent of both parties in the divorce. When the conditions laid down in the decree nisi are formally and officially met, the decree absolute is issued and the couple are divorced. 

UK Divorce Process

The thought of filing for a divorce in the UK can be daunting for anyone. The prospect of losing your lifetime partner can be bad enough, but the actual divorce process can be just as daunting if the process is not executed correctly. In order to get a divorce successfully, without problems, it is important to understand the actual process. Getting a good understanding of the UK divorce process will help you overcome obstacles that you may otherwise experience. So what is involved in the process?

To apply for a divorce in the UK, it is a compulsory requirement that one of the spouses has lived in England during the year preceding the divorce. If neither party contests the divorce proceeding towards an undefended divorce (which still takes at least six months) will be opened. If there are no children or immovable property in common, you can even do without a solicitor. The judge will make a decision called decree nisi and you will not need to appear at the hearing.

If there are children involved, however, the judge will want to ensure that the interests of the children are protected and may even wish to meet them in person (but only if they are older than 9 years).

In England and Wales, the vast majority of pensions owed to children is established by the Child Support Agency, which is an administrative agency under the Ministry of Social Security. The Child Support Agency calculates the amount of pension due to a child using a mathematical formula that has many parameters. As such, the debtor normally has great difficulty in determining in advance the amount of pension that will be payable to the children. Parents would have the opportunity to appeal decisions of the Child Support Agency. However, as the current system for determining and administering the pensions of children has been criticized, there have been attempts by the government to reform the system.

Six weeks after the decree nisi, the applicant will seek to divorce and request from the judge what is called a final decree absolute. If one spouse does not consent to the divorce, it will go through a procedure known as a Defended divorce and then you will need the help of a solicitor. The judge will pronounce the divorce if you can prove that the marriage is in a situation of irretrievable breakdown (which may be caused by acts such as adultery, unreasonable behavior, desertion of spouse, separation granted more than two years or 5 years when the separation is sustained).

Couples can use services such as family mediation if they feel that they can talk together and reach agreement. Several organizations offer such mediations and some firms of solicitors can also help.

How to Get a Divorce

While each person's situation is unique, there are steps to follow that are common to all in the event that you and/or your spouse decide to file for divorce. Here is some general divorce advice:

Become familiar with the divorce process
The process of divorce results in putting a legal end to a marriage. Although divorce proceedings differ from one state to another, most states follow a specific order:

A UK divorce will begin with a document called a Petition (or Complaint in some states) that formally notifies the court and the other spouse that he or she wishes to end the marriage. This document also presents an overview of terms, such as child support, custody and visitation rights, spousal support, property and debt division, and last-but-not-least, attorney's fees and costs.

Opposing papers or a response is then filed by the other spouse. In some states, if a spouse does not file opposing papers within a certain window time from when the petition was issued, the spouse can lose the right to have his or her side of the case presented in court.

Next, temporary orders lay down the short-term rules while the case is pending. The discovery, or legal procedure of gathering information about each spouse, can either be quick, or lengthy, costly and time-consuming.

Finally, a case can either be settled by an alternative dispute resolution, or it will need to go to trial. A divorce that goes to trial will typically most emotional and difficult, particularly for the children.

Choose an experienced divorce lawyer 
Your best source for divorce information is an experienced attorney. A lawyer can give you divorce information that is relevant to your specific needs. Some lawyers even specialize in divorce for men; and others are familiar with issues pertaining to women and divorce.

Developing a rapport with your attorney is an important step in understanding the entire divorce process. The more knowledge you have, the better-informed your decisions will be.